Blast from my past
When I was a kid (a long time ago) I fell in love with this very beautiful yet very complicated chic. Back then I was very naive and knew nothing about cutting my coat according to my size or chewing only what I could swallow.
This chic only saw me as a good friend and nothing beyond that…on my part I was madly in love. I kept sending her love texts in the middle of the night and very often calling just to hear her voice.
She was the kind of those complex chics you will never really get to understand anything about especially if you were as daft as I was back then. I tried all the tricks in the books to win her love but all that was in vain untill one day she told me point blank that she could be nothing more than a friend to me. That really broke my heart.
But then I I found out that a broken heart can be an inspiration to great art. So I started writing poems about love and heart break and today I thought I could just share my little secret poems with the world.
I am alive
I was dead until I met you.
My heart didn’t beat quite this fast,
My breath didn’t come in such short gasps,
My hands didn’t tremble at someone’s touch and
My eyes couldn’t see much this clear.
I was alive, but not enough to feel so.
I waited for my ultimate end,
wishing it could be fast and merciful enough to rescue me from this misery.
But all that changed when I met you.
I know am alive every time we’re together,
I am alive when I find myself laughing and
I am alive when you say you love me.
When destiny wrote our fates apart
Did it stop to consider how much I’d suffer,
Trying to make myself believe
That maybe, just maybe it made a mistake?
That somewhere along the way,maybe,just maybe
You could learn to love me back.
I have loved you since before time
But I’ve been too much of a coward to let you know
Everyday that passes means another day without you
And I keep hoping and praying that one day
Destiny will pity me enough
To write my fatel next to yours
I’m drowning in a sea of tumult and remorse
I don’t know how I got here.
I can feel this overwhelming wave of weakness washing over me,
Sharply cutting through the flesh of my chest,
Slowly killing me as it tears me apart
I don’t have the strength to hold the pieces in place anymore.
I can feel myself slipping,
I’m so close to letting go, to giving up, to letting it take over me,
But how am I going to be able to breathe?
To survive when I can barely control the rhythm of my heartbeat?
My heart has become as cold as a mid winter,
As numb as a cancerous flesh and as empty as a bottomless abyss.
I can’t find the words that shone on my lips nor the enchantment cursed upon my poetic soul
To release the surge of emotions that have now been drained out of me.
I can see, but cannot feel the depth before my sight.
I can hear, but cannot translate the gibberish upon my perception.
I’m losing the ability to tell beyond my God given senses
And only now do I see what a fool I have been.